Living at Ground Innocent

It is time for us to shift to living in an even greater state of feeling innocent than before. I know you are innocent – do you? How innocent are you feeling?

On a scale of 1-10 what would you say is your level of feeling and knowing you are innocent? No quick answer here – stop for a moment and check inside. Take a moment to make an honest assessment with your feelings, not your mind.

If you say you are living at level 10, I say “awesome!” I might have tried to get away with saying that, too, until I read a blog about our old stories we hang onto that hold us back. Well, that certainly took me on a journey I wasn’t expecting, and must admit I greatly needed.

I was already feeling a little out of balance because at the moment my business isn’t flowing quite like I want. This always triggers my judgments and feelings of fear and insecurity. So, I got up the courage to ask myself, “what is the old story I am hanging on to and living through?”

It was no surprise that I my fears had taken me back to a story I made up as a  child – I am guilty and God wants to punish me. This story/belief, created in my mind, was my child’s assumption from what she heard in church, school and the people around her. She decided she wasn’t the required “perfect,” and was certain this story was true.

I’ve done a lot of healing working around this belief, but…until this moment innocent wasn’t a word I could have used to describe me. Nor was my energy 100% in alignment with feeling innocent. I had to admit to myself that part of me was still living from this old story.

What story from your past is holding you back in your present?

I’m not implying that it is a “phony story.” And, it doesn’t mean it is a “true story” either. It is simply a story, told by you, playing in your head that causes you some level of pain – probably not all the time, but definitely in times of stress when you need to embrace your innocence the most. Instead, it most likely produces feelings of guilt or even shame. Mine certainly did.

Our stories make us live “smaller” than we  are.

That’s not what I want, and I know you don’t either. How do my feelings of innocence or guilt affect my life? How is this story affecting me in the present? I had to ask myself these questions:

  • Am I feeling safe, open, comfortable and transparent in my relationships?
  • Is it easy or a struggle for me to go for what I want in my career?
  • How willing am I to go out of my comfort zone and try new things?
  • Am I sometimes afraid to speak up when I have something to say?

The story we’re telling ourselves may be about the pain from a relationship, or career, money, or decisions we’ve made. Whatever the story it isn’t happening now, it’s in our past. We’re hanging on to something that no longer exists – perpetually making ourselves a victim.

How do I live in that state of knowing and feeling my innocence?

Here’s how I am ending the telling of my old story – I hope you find this helps you too.

  • I knew that avoiding facing it was no longer an option. What I resist had been persisting throughout my life. There could be no more escaping into my addictions – I mean the so-called healthy ones even, like work, reading a book or watching TV
  • I went inside my mind to talk with the originator of the story – in my case a little girl. Together we agreed to admit this wasn’t a true story – it was a story she made up and believed that was based on what was going on around her at the time. For the first time she, and I, became aware that she is innocent.
  • I admitted this was an old story – a very old, old story – it isn’t happening now. Do I really want to keep telling it, and have it diminish my life?
  • Then, I got out of my head and into my heart. I knew I had to feel my feelings of pain connected to the story. I know it is the energy of our feelings that perpetuate the story. A funny and wonderful thing occurs when you allow yourself to feel your pain – it begins to dissolve.
  • I stopped judging — a part of me was judging me for believing this story. I am choosing to accept in each moment that I am doing the best I am able to. Until I explored and dissected my old story, I actually believed it was true and my actions and feelings were the right ones.

Whenever the old story and belief pops up – and it does – I immediately stop and confront it, tell myself the truth and remind me I am innocent. And I give me some time to rise into that feeling of innocence and bask in it.

I am choosing to accept and love me in this moment – the messy and sometimes confused human that I am. I am here on earth to learn and am doing the best I can in each moment. And that’s okay. I am innocent.

I invite you to join me in the adventure of living at Ground Innocence.

1 Comment

  1. Shara Terry on January 22, 2018 at 8:00 pm

    So true Mardi ~ our old programing of story telling comes up often! WE are innocent and must remind ourselves of how special and wonderful we are! Thank you for sharing.

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